I am so SICK of being stuck in the middle. My family hates Dennis, even though my mom sometimes says she likes him, and Dennis can't stand most of my family because they hate him. I am so torn. I feel like I am being ripped in half. He is an absolute emotional wreck and he can't sleep or stop thinking or talking. Now he is selling everything he owns online to get money to get a vehicle so he can get a job and have something to live on because my parents are making him feel like a thief because they have helped him/us for so long. He loves his cd collection and I gave him a lot of them, but he is selling all of them. It really hurts me. I know it hurts him too but he says he has no choice. He said something my mom said recently in an email to me made him feel like she thinks he is a thief and he is not a thief. Every single day is filled with talk and complaining from both sides against the other and I am stuck in the middle because I see some of their points on both sides. Now we can't move to Findlay together because he is afraid to be there around my parents who do not like him. He made a resume last night and wants to spend days trying to get a job now, but we don't have money for him to use for gas. He says he is not going to rest until he gets a job. I am losing my mind and I am in so much pain from both my ankles and I need everyone to back off of me please. Please. I can't take being in the middle anymore.

I am 99% certain that my right Achilles tendon has now torn almost all of the way. The pain is getting really bad and it is very familiar. I already have an MRI order, I just haven't gotten it done yet. I guess I better do it soon. It is hurting bad tonight :(

I can access my DJ from my laptop again. I don't know why I couldn't there for awhile lol. The site eviljerry sent me helped me get to it and then after I did that a few times it just went back to normal. Very strange.

I think I have the best, prettiest and smartest dog in the whole world. She turns five this month on the 22nd. I wish I could turn the clock back so she would never die. I love her so much. I know there will never be another Luna, but I want another Border Collie when she is gone. She is the best.

Here are some pics from our recent blizzard. I took them by sticking my head out the door so they are not the best lol.

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Yeah working on the cd with the band and so far this is what we have done so far

These are the tracks and such and who wrote the music and lyrics for the songs as well

01) Intro : Music Ana
02) Cosmical Loss : Music: Shawn / Lyrics : J.C.
03) Disturbance In The Balance : Music: Ana / Lyrics: Brett
04) In The Shadow Of The Sun : Music: Brett / Lyrics: Ana
05) Turned Into Ashes : Music: J.C / Lyrics: Shawn
06) Within Smoke And Mirrors : Music: Ana / Lyrics: Brett
07) A Remembrance Of Life : Music: Ana
08) Into The Cold Winter : Music: Chris / Lyrics: J.C.
09) Sanctuary Flooded In Blood : Music: J.C. / Lyrics: Brett
10) Departure Of It All : Music: Shawn / Lyrics: Brett

We've only have about 3/4 of the cd done completely but it's looking good. Ana who is J.C.'s cousin wanted to be in the band because we didn't know at one point what was going to happen to J.C. as far as living over here wise but things changed and well we got to keep him and get someone else who was a little bit better at keyboards. And the artwork of the CD is awesome! Shawn is good at drawing and damn speechless.




But yeah so far things have been great!

We should be done like I don't know like around the first or second week of Jan. But other then that though this is the line up I almost forgot about that!

Brett "Death" : Vox, Bass Sessions
Shawn "Soothsayer" : Drums
J.C. "Frost" : Backup Vox, Guitar
Chris "Nemesis" : Lead Guitar
Ana "Rag Doll" : Keyboards
Adam "Ghoul" : Bass
~~~~WE ARE CYPHAMINE~~~~

For any of you dog owners out there....you should really try this food. It comes five star Luna approved! She LOVES this stuff, especially the chicken flavor because it has really peas and carrots in it and she loves carrots. This stuff looks like people food!

http://www.chef-michaels.com/?DCMP=KNC-CM-T08-Goog-CHEFM09&HBX_PK=chef+michael+dog+food&HBX_OU=50

Every time I get online I have lost another friend. I can't take it anymore.

I have created another WoW fiend! I hope! Dennis and I just played together for the second time and he couldn't believe it when we had already played for an hour. He said, "No wonder you play so long!" We are really having fun and I love it!

Dennis bought a software program that fixed my old computer! Yay! Now it stays on! And in my opinion, the best thing about that is I am installing a free trial of WoW on it so he can play with me! So far I have located 20 free days! I am so excited!

It's kind of funny how much enjoyment I am getting out of transferring Dennis' massive cd collection to the mp3 player Mom and I got hom for Christmas. I couldn't wait and I gave it to him early because he dearly loves music and he's been stressing so bad. He loves it and says it is the best gift ever. I still have four more things for him to open on Christmas that he will be almost or just as happy with I hope :)

We are going to stay here at our little house on the prairie for Christmas this year. If we end up moving in the spring it will be the only Christmas we had here. I love it here. I want to move back home bad though so I guess I need to focus on that. I miss my parents and it seems almost too good to be true to think that I could just drive across town and see them whenever I want soon.

Luna is snoring on the couch lol.